Secret Love Read online

  Loving a man is different. A man has experience and baggage and, in this case, confirmed kills.

  But somehow, loving Fox has always been easy.

  “Because you saved me,” I say. “You’ve always saved me.”

  Fox kisses my palm one more time before pulling me closer. His body feels so strong and taut as if the last few days had no effect on him at all. He wraps his arms around me, cradling me close, as he tilts his head and leans in.

  Our lips graze, but he doesn’t kiss me yet. We linger here for moments, happy to breathe in each other’s air. Every second together in this cabin is precious gold. If we don’t treasure it now…

  My eyes brim with tears, but I refuse to let them fall. I refuse to make tonight about them. Snake Eyes. Mercer. My father. None of them matter. As far as I’m concerned, the world is already over. There’s nothing but a barren wasteland outside of these walls. Inside, it’s just Fox and me.

  I smile, praying for it to be true.

  Fox rests a hand on the back of my neck. He licks his lips and takes another breath. Another second passes, warm and blissful, before he finally presses his lips against mine.

  I close my eyes, embracing the feeling inside of me. Fox trembles as my fingertips brush along his abs, striking a fire between us like little match tips. Our passions grow, driven by a need that’s lingered between us since the moment he came home.

  Fox pushes me back against the door. I submit to his kisses as his mouth travels my neck. He pulls back, another wave of resistance taking over as he gazes into my eyes. I pull my shirt off over my head in response, exposing myself to him as an insatiable hunger fills his eyes again.

  His hands reach behind me and he secures his grip on my rear before lifting me off the floor. I can’t pull my lips from his as he carries me across the room and lowers me onto his bed.

  I lie back as he raises his shirt over his head. The black eyes of the cobra stare down at me from his bruised skin, a permanent reminder of the threat looming between us. I reach out and run my fingers along its tail. It’s just ink. Nothing more. Just a meaningless picture sketched by a needle. I lean forward and kiss his chest while he reaches around to unhook my bra. I let it slip down my arms and I lie down as Fox admires my exposed breasts, his eyes wide and full of temptation.

  He descends me again, his breath hot and wild against my skin. Nerves dance all over me, my heart beating hard as I try to hold myself together while he licks and nibbles with intent to devour me whole.

  “Fox,” I say.

  He kisses my belly once more, his fingers hooked along the elastic of my pants. “Yeah?”

  “I should probably tell you that…” I swallow hard, “that I haven’t been with anybody since…”

  Fox pauses and releases my pants before making his way back to me. “Since me?” he asks.

  “I couldn’t…” I bite my lip, unable to find the words. “I mean, I’ve dated, but… when it came time to…” I look down his body as my own ignites for him even more. “I couldn’t. They weren’t you, you know?”

  He smirks in the dark. “Yeah, I know.”

  “I don’t care if you have,” I say. “I just thought you should know in case I’m…”

  I pinch my eyes closed as a rush of painful heat tingles my cheeks.

  Stupid, stupid.

  Fox chuckles as he settles on his elbow beside me. “Well, then, I guess I should probably tell you… that I haven’t been with anybody either.”

  I open my eyes again in surprise. “Really?”

  “I’ve been tempted,” he says. “More times than I can say, but…” He runs a hand along my unwounded cheek and smiles. “They weren’t you. No one’s ever made me feel more like the man I want to be than you.”

  My throat tightens. “Fox, I’m sorry,” I whisper. “I don’t know how our lives got so fucked up…”

  Still, he smiles and touches his nose to mine. “I’m not. Fucked up or not, it all led me back to you.” He takes my hand and brings it to his lips. “Even if we only get one night.”

  I bite my bottom lip, but it trembles anyway.

  He kisses me. “Don’t think about it, Dani,” he whispers. “Just be here. Now. With me.”

  I close my eyes, somehow willing my tears to disappear. I take a deep breath, somehow able to relax and let go. I kiss him again and he takes hold of me, pulling me close until our bodies are flush together, and somehow… I find peace.

  Fox turns me onto my back again. I settle against the pillow, my curious hands roaming along his back as he balances over me. Bandages cover him from his neck to the small of his back. I keep my touch light, not wanting to disturb them. Instead, I feel other bumps along his torso. Other scars. Memories of his life before tonight.

  I kiss him to make him forget. He smiles to let me know it works.

  I part my knees and he settles between them, his hard body pressed against mine. He gives me a hundred kisses, a hundred moments that leave me throbbing and breathless. I grind my hips along his hard erection. He bites my nipples and massages my breasts. We release awkward chuckles as we try new things and tell each other what feels good.

  Fox gives me a long kiss, his groan echoing from the back of his throat. He touches my navel with a firm palm before sliding his hand beneath the elastic band of my pants. I do the same to him, eagerly reaching in to feel the thick shaft hidden inside. Fox releases a growl as I stroke him. I gasp between kisses as my hips buck on their own, begging to be tamed. I say his name, not caring how loud it is or who might hear us. He smothers me with his kiss, our moans blending together beneath the moonlight of the window.

  Fox pulls my pants down to my ankles and I kick them off. I lie still as he kneels in front of me on the bed. He kisses my neck and my breasts. He licks between them on the way down my navel. I run my fingers through his thick hair, gently mewling as he kisses my hips and nibbles my inner thighs. His beard tickles me and I laugh, the sound lost somewhere between my moans.

  My breath catches, but I don’t want to stop. I watch as his mouth inches closer to my throbbing core. God, just one touch and I’ll—

  “You’re so beautiful, Dani,” he whispers, his warm breath on my folds.

  I’m gonna—

  Fox kisses the hood and I shudder.

  Fuck.

  My thighs quiver around him. “Fox,” I moan.

  He smiles. He leaves another tempting kiss in the same spot as he taps my entrance with a lonely finger.

  “Yes,” I say before he can even ask.

  He slides the finger inside and my toes curl. Heaven fills me from the inside, threatening to explode out of every piece of me. Fox thrusts slowly, making me feel it, as he firmly licks my clit. I watch with blurred vision as I tremble uncontrollably on the edge of climax.

  “Oh, god,” I moan again, barely able to speak.

  He doesn’t stop or speak. He keeps going, lapping and massaging the life out of me until there’s nothing left to do but scream.

  The tension breaks and I fall to pieces. I fight for breath. I squeeze his hair with one hand while I dig my nails into the bed with the other. I come for him. I give my everything to him.

  Fox. My stepbrother. My protector and my biggest fan.

  I’ve given him all of me once before.

  I’ll gladly do it again. And again.

  I sit forward and cup his face, eagerly drawing him toward my lips. My body buzzes with warm fire, a fire I’m more than willing to share with him. Fox lets me guide him to sit as I shift off the bed onto the floor. I rest on my knees between his legs, my tongue salivating for him.

  “Lie back,” I whisper.

  Fox moves onto his elbows, careful to keep his wounded back off the bed. I hook his pants and pull them down, too aroused to care about the nerves involved in seeing a naked man again.

  I toss his pants away and pause to admire his chiseled form. Fox was always athletic but not like this. His muscles have muscles now, so firm and toned all over. I bite my
lip and gawk at the hard V-shape pointing down at his stiff cock resting against his belly. Nerves twist into butterflies deep inside but it all melts away when I see the way Fox looks at me. I kiss his lap and thighs with teasing lips before opening my mouth to him.

  His tip is hard and wet, throbbing against my tongue as I take him inside. His entire body flexes and he takes in a sharp inhale, his hand slowly coming to rest on the back of my neck. He twirls my hair around his fingers, but he doesn’t pull me down. He lets me taste and play. I test myself, taking him in as far as I can as I suck and lick.

  “Dani,” he breathes. “You feel so good.”

  I touch him. I look up into his eyes. I happily swallow the pre-cum gathering on his tip. I take great pleasure in pleasing him, feeling the same sinful rebellion I felt in his bed five years ago.

  His grip tightens on my hair. “I’m so close,” he says in warning.

  My own sex churns as I feel the hard quiver of his abs. His tip pulses between my lips but I don’t dare pull him out. I swirl my tongue around it, and he groans for me. He lightly tugs on my hair, another warning.

  “Dani…”

  I bob my head. I tighten my lips. I suck him as hard as I can.

  “Fuck.”

  Fox comes with another groan. He sprays onto my tongue, tasting salty and sweet. I wait for him to finish, enjoying the musk of him too much to pull him out. His hand gently glides through my hair, a show of loving affection that trembles my spine.

  I sit back and swallow, my throat tingling with satisfaction.

  “Fucking hell, Dani…”

  I look up as Fox’s hands cup my face.

  “You’re so fucking perfect,” he says, pulling me up off the floor onto his lap.

  I straddle him as he holds me against him. He crushes his mouth on mine, gently soothing my numb lips with firm, warm kisses.

  “You didn’t have to do that,” he says, clawing my back.

  “I wanted to,” I say, gasping for air.

  He forces our lips together again. His kisses become hard and wild, an insatiable lust traveling from his tongue onto mine. I feel his erection growing between us again and I stiffen as I feel it press along my still-dripping slit.

  “I need you,” he says with heat on his breath. “Fuck, Dani, I need you…”

  I reach down to take hold of his cock and guide it toward my entrance. His touch digs into my spine, begging me to drive him home. He kisses my collarbone and licks the sweat off my neck. I quiver on him, feeling an impossible passion take hold of me, as I push him inside.

  We moan together, our lips entwined. I hover on him, my inexperience bringing me pause. I place my hands on his thighs to prop myself up, looking down to watch as he disappears even deeper inside.

  Fox puts his hands on my hips and moves me forward and back. His cock glides in and out, the image alone enough to spark life through my sex. Instinct carries me further and I move my hips to match Fox’s guiding hand. He lets go and places one thumb against my clit between us, sending a fresh fire throughout my body.

  I squeeze his thighs beneath me as I grind against his touch. “Oh, god,” I moan.

  He thrusts upward in time with my movements. We laugh and moan and kiss, our sweat-covered bodies becoming one.

  When I come again, I do it with tears in my eyes. Never in my life, never once beneath the glaring Hollywood spotlight, have I ever felt so good. So trusted and wanted. So unbelievably loved.

  I let my tears fall and Fox pauses to kiss my cheeks. “Do you need to stop?” he asks.

  I shake my head, unable to speak. I kiss him instead and he wraps his thick arms around me. He lifts me up and turns us around on the bed, laying me down on my back. I hook my legs along his waist as he aligns us and sheaths himself inside of me again.

  Waves of heat overtake me as he thrusts harder and faster. I lie back, letting it wash over me. Fox holds me down at the wrists, but I happily submit to the rough touch. He leans in to kiss me, quickly leaving pecks on my face, neck, and chest. I moan from pleasure and pain as my groin and legs grow tired.

  “Fox,” I say, my voice struggling as the bed creaks loudly.

  I look up into his dark eyes and that damned cobra stares back at me, black and cold. I see it all in his eyes. All the death and pain. Blood and terror.

  I twist my hand to entwine our fingers. “Fox,” I say again. “Look at me.”

  He pauses his thrust deep inside of me and releases my other wrist.

  “Come back.” I cup his face. “It’s just you and me.”

  His chest heaves, but I see the light slowly returning to his eyes. He rests his head on my shoulder. I kiss his forehead.

  “I’m sorry,” he whispers. “If I hurt you…”

  “You didn’t,” I say, stroking a finger through his beard. “I thought I lost you for a second.”

  He smiles and kisses my palm. “You couldn’t.”

  I kiss his sweet lips. “Keep going.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes.” I touch his back and remember his bandages. “Aren’t you in pain?”

  “Oh, yeah,” he says, our lips grazing again. “But it’s worth it.”

  We laugh as his hips begin that lovely, teasing grind again.

  It feels good to forget the outside world. No Snake Eyes. No Mercer Black. No over-protective father who will surely throw a conniption fit when he finds out about this. Just me and Fox in his cabin, finally together against all odds.

  I don’t want this night to end.

  But every scene eventually fades to black.

  Chapter 31

  Fox

  Dani. My beautiful Dani.

  Even while she’s sleeping.

  I don’t have to worry about accidentally waking her. Being stealthy has always come naturally for me. The question is whether I should.

  She won’t be happy either way. If I wake her to say goodbye, she’ll try to stop me from leaving. I can’t guarantee I’ll go after that. It’s hard enough watching her sleep knowing it’s the last time I ever will. If she opens her eyes right now and tears fall out, I’ll lose sight of what really matters. A life with me is no life at all. It’s a death wish.

  I’ll let her sleep.

  I put on a suit and drop the flash drive into my pocket. It sits there, burning a hole like a lit cigarette — but I suppose a stick of dynamite is a more accurate comparison. In an hour, one of the deadliest secrets on the planet will be exposed, along with anyone who knows about it. There are some big names on that list, bigger than me or Mercer or even Ronnie Lamb. They won’t be happy.

  But Dani will be safe.

  One last look. Her eyes twitch behind her lids. Given the last few days she’s had, I can’t be sure if it’s a good dream or a bad one. Even in darkness, her face is so bright — full of color and life. I bet I’m glowing a bit after last night, too.

  One last perfect night with her. At least, I got that. At least, I got one reminder of how it feels to be inside of her and what she tastes like. Of what noises she makes when I touch her just right. What it’s like to hear her moan my name again.

  At least, I have that.

  Fuck. I can’t leave her yet.

  I walk over to the bed and kneel beside it. She lies on her back with the comforter up to her shoulders. Her unnatural, black hair is a little messed up but that’s okay. She’s still the most beautiful woman in the world. Mercer tried to change that but even those stitches don’t do a damn thing.

  I reach out to touch her, but I stop before my fingers graze her skin. I can’t risk waking her, no matter how much I want to hear her voice or look into her eyes one last time.

  Dani. My beautiful Dani.

  I hope you remember me the way I’ll remember you.

  I step outside. The air is soft and warm. It’s the first morning so far this year that’s felt more like spring than winter. It’s almost fitting that nice weather shows up the second I enter a concrete box, but I’ve had worse luck, that�
�s for sure.

  It’s a long drive into the city. The closer I get, the larger the rock in my gut feels. I keep her face in my mind and it shrinks a bit. I think of her smile and it gets even smaller.

  The police station comes into view. I park the car on the street outside.

  I inhale and exhale slowly.

  This is it. This is the moment when everything changes.

  The dull rumble of voices fills my ears as soon as I enter the station. Uniforms jolt around the front lobby, brushing past a desk Sergeant who looks a bit pissed off that she decided to show up to work today. Her eyes shift between a stack of paperwork and the television on the wall.

  I keep my focus and walk up to the desk. “Excuse me.”

  “I’ll be right with you, sir,” she mutters without a glance in my direction.

  I glower, but I suppose I should enjoy my last few moments as a free man. Take a breath. Enjoy the sunlight.

  The television grabs my attention, but it doesn’t keep it. I’m not too fond of twenty-four hour news networks. They just fill time and wait for the next disaster to strike. Today’s talking heads seem fixated on fire. Flames ravage an office block in…

  Burbank?

  I shift slightly, turning to get a better view. I have plenty memories of walking down that street to meet my mother for lunch.

  Bennett’s office.

  My stomach turns.

  “Crazy, huh?”

  I look at the Sergeant. “Yeah.”

  “First, that movie star goes missing, and now her daddy’s office burns down?” She shakes her head. “I know coincidence when I see it, and that ain’t it.”

  I hold my breath. She’s got a point.

  Mercer. Who else would have done this?

  But why?

  “Did you need something, sir?”

  To get my attention.

  Again.

  “Sir?”

  Which means…

  Christ, what have I done?

  “Do you have a public phone?” I ask her.

  She points behind me. “Payphone around the corner.”

  “Thank you.”

  I walk away from the desk and search my pockets for any loose change. I don’t have any but, luckily, I find a quarter in the phone’s coin return slot.